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Pursuant to the above paragraph, you acknowledge that you are fully responsible for everything that happens to you — whether good or bad — that you have no one to blame for your unhappiness, and that you can change your destiny at any time by altering behaviors or patterns that don't work for you. Trust me on this. There can be miracles when you believe. You do also agree to at least consider the following: The key to happiness is taking a moment or two each day to be grateful for what you’ve got. Without gratitude, it's impossible to be happy. Drink plenty of water. Don’t barge onto elevators without first letting people get off. Don’t put up with people who barge onto elevators without first letting you get off. It's OK to make a scene sometimes. But don’t stab anyone in the back — you never know when you’ll need to borrow a cup of money or a chainsaw from them. “Rising above it” is a nice idea, but it’s not always gratifying. If you love someone, let them know. If you don’t, then let them go. You’ve gotta know when to hold ’em. Know when to fold ’em. Know when to walk away. And know when to run. Before you criticize someone, take a moment to consider whether or not they deserve it. And if they do, criticize away. But remember what they say about sticks and stones. Don’t do drugs. Thank you for reading. Have a nice day.

Feel free to print this important disclaimer and read it every day. Or chant it out loud as a mantra. Just please keep the environment in mind when you do. Maybe use a tiny piece of paper. Or something recycled. Because the planet is really pissed off right now and you don't want to make it worse. Thank you.


bike-300x222Born and raised in Normal, Illinois, Winston Gieseke craved attention at a young age. To escape the banality of a healthy, cornfed Midwestern existence, he studied piano and music theory in a children's program at Illinois Wesleyan University, wrote short stories and plays, read true crime books, and performed in various high school and community theater productions.


His dream of becoming the next Woodward and Bernstein was thwarted when he was denied entrance into the University of Iowa's prestigious journalism school, so, inspired by the Village People, he went west to Los Angeles at 18 and graduated three years later from California State University, Northridge, with a degree in screenwriting.


He wrote episodes for Hollywood Off-Ramp (the E! channel's first fictional series) and penned the made-for-cable movie Romantic Comedy 101, which starred Tom Arnold and Joey Lawrence.


Still thirsty for attention, Winston began mic-crashing at now-defunct L.A. piano bars like The Oasis & The Other Side. He auditioned for and was rejected by L.A. productions of Falsettos and Rent before making his professional singing debut on a grisly episode of Millennium, Fox's X-Files spin-off, crooning "This Little Light of Mine" as a woman faced death by real estate sign.


Not content to be a mere brushstroke in someone else's painting, he took to performing solo wherever he could find an audience. His first one-man show at the Gardenia in Hollywood played to a sold-out house, and a CD of that event is available if you can find someone to burn it for you. His second musical showcase wasn’t as good, but there's a CD of that one, too.





When performing for small, drunken audiences grew tiresome, Winston entered a contest to sing the National Anthem at an L.A. Dodgers game and won. He was invited back twice and hopes to one day have the stadium renamed in his honor. His 2004 production, Giving 'Til It Hurts You, a one-man musical extravaganza that featured three other people, played for four weeks at the Split.Id Theater in Hollywood.


Winston next spent two seasons simultaneously working on the hit ABC Family series Wildfire and composing tantalizing copy for adult sites like Penthouse online and Napali Video ("Home of Big Breast Glamour & Cat Fights").


winston-gieseke_m-barDoing his part to save the planet while also titillating it, he has written informative articles for a green alternative lifestyle website and an indie rock magazine, as well as tantalizing features for Men and Freshmen magazines, for which he somehow ended up becoming editor in chief. His dreams of becoming a respectable journalist were finally realized when he was hired as managing editor of The Advocate. He has also been a contributor to, Frontiers, Palm Springs Life,, PetLife, Me Yah Whae, and The Guide.


In 2011, Winston returned to the stage for a two-night gig called Accidentally Overserved at M Bar. A live recording of the show titled On The Edge was released on LML Music in August 2012. In addition, he's performed with the Palm Springs Gay Men's Chorus and been a soloist with Harmonic Voices.


He spent two years in Berlin, an experience he shamelessly exploited at the now-defunct, and is the editor of the anthologies Indecent Exposures, Daddy Knows Best, Straight No More, Blowing Off Class, Whipping Boys, Until the Sun Rises, Out of Uniform, Hired Hands, Slave Boys, and the 2014 Lambda Literary finalist Team Players.


His passions include history (he has served on the board of the Culver City Historical Society), criminology, the musicals of Stephen Sondheim, and the films of Nacho Vidal. He counts Henry Rollins and Patty Hearst among his many influences.


Thoughts, words, and deeds. With music.

Mario Lopez Shows Off with Rated M

Mario Lopez Shows Off w...

Closet Case Killer

Closet Case Killer

Henry Rollins Rocks

Henry Rollins Rocks

Fred Hersch: Art Imitates Life

Fred Hersch: Art Imitat...

CNN’s Don Lemon is an Open Book

CNN’s Don Lemon i...

Taking LGBT Off the Menu

Taking LGBT Off the Men...

Samuel Colt: Man of the Year

Samuel Colt: Man of the...

My Interview with Diesel Washington

My Interview with Diese...

Aiden Shaw: Portrait of the Artist as a Hung Man

Aiden Shaw: Portrait of...

Brunch with Johnny Hazzard

Brunch with Johnny Hazz...

A Rant About Censorship

A Rant About Censorship

Porn Stars Do It Bloggy Style (SFW)

Porn Stars Do It Bloggy...

Onzo vs. YourEyes: Knowledge is Power

Onzo vs. YourEyes: Know...

Congrats from Idina Menzel

Congrats from Idina Men...

Wildfire DVD Commentary!

Wildfire DVD Commentary...

Celebrity PDG: Public Display of Greenness

Celebrity PDG: Public D...

24 Hours of Sunshine / (I’d Rather Be) Sailing

24 Hours of Sunshine / ...

O Say Can You See

O Say Can You See

Fox Movie Channel Appearance

Fox Movie Channel Appea...


Various projects I've had the pleasure of working on


Carbuncle (2006) ... Regional Center Receptionist

Book of Love (1990) [uncredited]

The Girl Who Came Between Them (1990) ... soldier

The Forbidden Dance (1990) [uncredited]


Wildfire (2005-2008)
(episode "Nothing Takes The Past Away Like The Future")
(episode "Who Are You?")

Romantic Comedy 101 (2002)

Hollywood Off-Ramp (2000)
(episode "Looking For Mr. Campbell")
(episode "And On Your Left…")
(episode "Lights! Camera! Reaction!")

The Cape (1996-1997)
(episode "Reggie’s Wild Ride")


On The Edge (2012)

Danglin' Man (2003)

Live at The Gardenia (2003)


Until the Sun Rises

Whipping Boys

Blowing Off Class

Straight No More

Team Players

Daddy Knows Best

Indecent Exposures


Accidentally Overserved at M Bar
M Bar, Hollywood
November 18-19, 2011

Giving 'Til It Hurts You
Split.Id Theater, Hollywood
July 31-August 21, 2004

Danglin' Man
The Gardenia, Los Angeles
October 30, 2003

One Night Only
The Gardenia, Los Angeles
August 6, 2003

  • Saucy yet heartfelt, On The Edge takes classic material, turns it upside down, and then spits it out with panache.

    ― Frontiers
  • Winston Gieseke’s script [for Hollywood Off-Ramp] has more than a few surprises, along with a memorable conclusion.

    ― The Hollywood Reporter
  • [Saw] a performance by Winston Gieseke at the Split.Id Theatre on Santa Monica Boulevard. It was a pretty good show...

    ― Confessions of a Songwriter


Thank you for helping to spread the good word.


We begin our classroom with a questionnaire that was invented by some guy named Bernard Pivot...

What is your favorite word?


What is your least favorite word?


What turns you on?
a Judy Garland marathon on TCM


What turns you off?
Bernard Pivot


What sound or noise do you love?


What sound or noise do you hate?
car horns


What is your favorite processed food product?


What is your favorite curse word?


Who is your favorite Australian author?
Neal Drinnan


What profession, other than yours, would you like to attempt?
sound engineer


What profession would you not like to participate in?
Chinese food menu deliverer


Who is your favorite musician who disappeared in a plane during WWII?
Glenn Miller


What sort of music is on your iPhone?
I like showtunes and classic country. And Simon & Garfunkel. Queen really inspires me, as do Me First and the Gimme Gimmes, Katy Perry, and Robbie Williams. I also enjoy audiobooks. Biographies and self-help, mostly.


Who’s your favorite actress?
Anna Kendrick and Mandy Moore.


That’s two. Who do you most want to meet before you die?
Patty Hearst. Before she dies.


Are your TV and film credits real or are they made up?
They’re real. If I’d made them up, they’d be more impressive.


Do you think Oswald acted alone?


I think you’re cute and I’d like to date you. Are you available?
Depends on how cute you are. I mean, no.


Do you believe in life after love?
I can feel something inside me say I really don’t think you’re strong enough. No.


Are these questions really frequently asked, or did you make them up and then answer them yourself?
Actually, I wrote them and someone else answered them.


Can I borrow five dollars?


Finally, if heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arive at the pearly gates?
"Here's some Velveeta."


For real answers to real questions, hit the Contact tab or scroll down.


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